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All right, folks, it’s time for us to get on the game of extreme unicorn hammer tag! Trust me, there’s nothing like finding a unicorn, raising your hammer, and

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So let’s get started! First of all, select your hammer and your clothes carefully, as the first rule of hammer tag is ensuring no bits of

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and it can all be machine-washed. Next, find a unicorn. Ideally, you want one that’s pregnant, as most unicorns cannot

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But, of course, you may not have access to a stretch of woods without police officers, much less an area where no one notices you covered in

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After all that, wash the

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out of your hair, and let us know how it went in the comments of this week’s What Are You Playing!

Bonus question: What was the weirdest restaurant dining experience you ever had?

Andrew Ross (@dengarsw): More Pokemon Go to help me fight back the chub, some Animal Crossing because I love my town (and have a flower-infestation I should really deal with), and my console party host is having a virtual party, so at least some Jackbox games, woo!

Let’s see, weirdest internet-shareable restaurant dining experience. Oh! This was just a few years ago at a family friend’s wedding reception. Super small, just the groom’s immediate family and aunt, and my family friends, plus me (we’re fairly close). For those who don’t know, Hawaii has a huge Japanese tourist scene. Like, I’ve been to the “English” speaking parts of Hawaii, and also the Japanese parts. This was a Japanese part, but the MC at the reception really wanted to use her English I think. She mistook me and the other sister as a couple and then constantly checked in with me about how every dish of a course meal tasted. To the exclusion of almost everyone else. The bride and groom are pretty private, so they seemed a little relieved, but we all had a good laugh once we were out of earshot.

Brianna Royce (@nbrianna, blog): I’ve been back in Star Wars Galaxies Legends (I know, I suck at breaks). This week I’ve been baking droid and armor comps, so this weekend I’ll be turning those into droids and armor. But I’m trying to do as much in factory work as possible to save my clickin’ hand!

I can’t really think of any weird ones. Memorable, yes. Embarrassing, absolutely. How about amusing: I planned my wedding with a brunch buffet for the guests with all my favorite brunchy foods because I’m a breakfast person (it was a morning wedding/reception on a riverboat). But of course, no bride has time for eating, so I never got to taste it. Womp womp. Incidentally, I legit put a homemade Star Wars cake topper on our gourmet wedding cake, and hell yes I still have it.

Chris Neal (@wolfyseyes, blog): I suddenly got the bug to hop back in to City of Heroes: Homecoming and was reminded how much fun it is, so that is likely going to be a primary source of my gaming this weekend. Maybe a bit of Swords ‘n Magic and Stuff as well. Additionally, the Re-Reckoning has me wanting to reinstall and dive deeper into the vanilla Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning. But mostly it’s CoH for me I think.

I legitimately can’t say I’ve had a weird dining experience at a restaurant before. Nothing that interesting happens to me, I guess.

Eliot Lefebvre (@Eliot_Lefebvre, blog): Welcome to the craft slog in Final Fantasy XIV. Population: me. Maybe there will be time for other things, but there’s really no way to be sure right now.

Most of my terrible experiences dining out were more “traumatic” than “funny,” but the question was weirdest, and that was definitely when my wife and I stopped in a diner on the way to the Roger Williams Park Zoo and felt literally every single eye in the diner turn on us suspiciously. We had just seen Inception a couple days earlier and I swear, everyone in there from the staff on down was giving us the stink-eye. It was unnerving.

Sam Kash (@thesamkash): I think I’ll be playing Spellbreak this weekend. Nothing too hot popping off in my normal rotation of games and this one is fun and new. Mostly new.

I’m sure I’ve had a fair share of awkward dining experiences but the best for now happened at a nice little restaurant when I was on a date. It was kind of a fancy place and the food didn’t come cheap. Well being trendy in this case also meant all the tables were cramped close enough that you could basically touch elbows with the table next to you. As soon as our fancy onion rings arrived, the gentleman at the next table took a deep whiff and said, “wow, that looks and smells great, save one for me.” To which my date and I chuckled and agreed. Upon finishing the onion rings, this man turned, slightly aghast, and said, “oh so you didn’t save one, huh”. Umm, oops? We didn’t think he seriously wanted us to give him one, just one of those friendly things people might say. He eyeballed us a few times while we finished up our main course and overall made the rest of the meal a bit awkward.

Tyler Edwards (blog): I’ve started on the full version of Iron Harvest 1920. It definitely keeps you on your toes, even playing on easy, but I’m really enjoying it. The story’s really grabbing me, and it feels like it’s bringing a lot of really fresh ideas to the RTS genre. I’ve never played an RTS game where movement and positioning – not just of your army on the map, but individual units moment to moment – mattered so much. The skill cap on this game is enormously high.

Bonus question: Being who I am, I have no shortage of awkward, embarrassing, or otherwise unpleasant stories. I also used to live in Parkdale (a particularly colorful part of the city), and still visit there often, so I’ve had plenty of wild times there. One time while having lunch in my favorite Tibetan cafe, some new guys showed up and got into a fight right there – one guy got thrown into a wall. They were promptly – and very politely – thrown out.

Every Saturday, join the Massively OP community and staff for What Are You Playing, our roundup of what MMORPGs and other games we’re hoping to play this weekend (with a bonus question or two for our amusement). Tell us what you’re up to! Go off-topic! And don’t forget to have fun!

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Eric Danlock

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Dota 2 competitive player/analyst/panellist from mains.io. A lifelong nerd who has almost certainly spent more time in front of various screens and monitors than is strictly healthy.

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